ANTHROPOPHAGUS

I'm always baffled by how filmmakers like Joe D'Amato got to be so prolific. It must have to do with ticket returns or something else economically related as his talent level as a director swerved wildly between that of a piece of moldy bread and a corpse. That is to say, as far as being a director, he had no skills whatsoever. His films are always dull, always nonsensical, never entertaining and rarely exciting. Sure he's had a few decent films sprinkled through his filmography - his sole giallo DEATH SMILED AT MURDER and a personal favorite, EMANUELLE IN AMERICA, come to mind - but overall D'Amato was so profoundly incompetent that is a minor miracle he ever got to make a single film at all.


Anthropophagus

D'Amato's real name Aristide Massaccesi appears in the credits of a good number of films and it's usually in the role of cinematographer. I believe this is where D'Amato's true skills shined. In films like WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO SOLANGE?, the little seen giallo THE KILLER IS ON THE PHONE, and even sub-par spaghetti westerns like NEVADA KID and DEAD MEN DON'T MAKE SHADOWS, D'Amato showed himself capable of creating striking visual compositions. It's almost incomprehensible that someone who could operate WITH a director could fail so hard AS a director, especially given the fact that he often acted as cinematographer on his own directorial efforts. But that's a discussion for another time, I suppose...


Anthropophagus Video Nasties

Back to the matter at hand. ANTHROPOPHAGUS, D'Amato's 1980 cult classic, is primarily known for a single scene - the forceful removal of a fetus from the womb of a pregnant woman - and the controversy that followed because of it. ANTHROPOPHAGUS was one of the infamous "Video Nasties" that were seized, banned and barred from exhibition in the U.K. during the video boom of the 1980s, a fact that lent this wholly unremarkable film a certain aire of danger, a reputation as a little-seen shock classic. The abortion-cannibalism scene aside, ANTHROPOPHAGUS does not live up to it's sleazy, gruesome reputation. It is exceedingly slow, terribly boring and so lacking in any horror excess that it comes off feeling confused and melodramatic instead of shocking or horrific.


Joe D'Amato Anthropophagus

This is one of those films that dances around it's plot for almost half it's running time before settling in on anything close to a narrative. Events happen but they seem to happen adjacent to the plot. That is, they seem to have no real impact on the story at all - for example, a character's wife is abducted by the villain only to have the plot development dropped until the final third of the film. Characters wander around aimlessly, dropping their previously held motives and fears whenever the screenplay calls for someone to do something, ANYTHING, to get the movie moving along. By the time the cannibalistic villain comes full strength into the story, we've already lost 2/3s of the film. Good horror films are driven by suspense, by the thought that everything could go to hell at any moment. This film is driven by nothing at all except impatience. We can't wait for the villain to show up just so we can say something is happening.


Anthropophagus Cannibal

I've seen more than my fair share of awful horror films but I honestly believe that a bad Italian horror film is worse than virtually any other kind of horror film. Watching ANTHROPOPHAGUS made me long for NEW YEAR'S EVIL. That's as potent an insult as I could possibly throw at this film. The fact that ANTHROPOPHAGUS has built up such a rabid fan base over the years is utterly baffling to me. There's simply nothing to it, no craft, no skill, no storytelling worth mentioning and barely even a single passible performance. There is also no suspense, no shocks, no sleaze, no nothing. All it has going for it is it's reputation. And it does not, in anyway, deserve it. ANTHROPOPHAGUS is a total bore of a film.


Not recommended.